Psalm 46

God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change
And though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea;
Though its waters roar and foam,
Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride.

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
The holy dwelling places of the Most High.
God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
The nations made an uproar, the kingdoms tottered;
He raised His voice, the earth melted.
The Lord of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our stronghold.

Come, behold the works of the Lord,
Who has wrought desolations in the earth.
He makes wars to ease to the end of the earth;
He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;
He burns the chariots with fire.
"Cease striving and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
The Lord of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our stronghold.

As I read these words today, I was struck by the power of my God. He is the one to whom I can run in times of trouble and in times of joy. In times of struggle, He is still God. When the things around me are unknown to me, He is God. I want to make my God glad. I desire for my life to be a pleasing sacrifice, a sweet aroma to my King.

So in the midst of my striving to know the future, today I stop and know that He is God. I exalt Him in my life. He is with me. He is my stronghold. I will take a firm grasp on the Truth that I know and trust in that.

Seek the Truth

I've been inundated with conversations about the future lately. Will I stay in China or will I seek a life somewhere else? And if I don't stay in Kunming, where will I go? Back to Michigan? To another country? To another state? What will I do? What job will I get? What car will I drive? If I stay, will I keep teaching 3rd grade? Will my roommate stay too? Who will leave? Who will come?

Too many questions to wrap my mind around. And none of them answer the ultimate question I've been asking - where does my God want me to be? What will please Him the most so that I can serve Him the best? With all of these conversations I have gotten good advice, great opinions and biased suggestions. But these are not the people I seek to serve. I serve the God of the universe, the God who created me and knit me together. He knows me better than I know myself (thankfully), and He knows my path.

So now what? What path will I choose? Because, ultimately, it is my choice. I truly don't think there is a "wrong" decision here. Just like most of the major decisions in my life thus far - it's a choice. Either way I am serving and loving God. Either way He will bless my path if I seek Him out and obey his commands.

I have no idea what my future will hold, but I do know that I will hold strong to the Lord and put my trust in Him.


A few pictures to make this post more fun:

The most recent family time I've had looks like this...


Embracing the Asian-ness at last year's International Fair

The Hills

Three weeks into being back in China I have had my first adventure. On Saturday I went with a few friends on a biking and hiking adventure. We left our apartment after a delicious banana-chocolate chip pancake breakfast and rode our bikes toward the Western Hills. Kim and Tonya decided to take us a different way through a village. It was all fine and dandy until the path we were following got smaller and smaller until we were walking our bikes along a 2 foot cement path around the edge of Dianchi Lake. We walked for about 30 minutes around the lake until we got to the road and were able to make our way up into the mountains.


This was the widest point of the path... the majority of the time we were walking along only the cement strip with a little bit of grass on the left side and a drop off to the lake on the other side.

It was such a fun adventure. Once we got up to the mountain road we biked through a few villages, took a van ride to a trail where we hiked even further up to another cute village, then biked back to Kunming for a short rest before dinner. There are definite perks to living so close to the mountains.

A few views along the way.

This year has been great so far. Two weeks of school are finished, plans for vacation are already underway and life is settling back into a groove. Here's hoping this year will be filled with good adventures...

Transition

We had a meeting after school today to talk about transition in our community. Living overseas almost always entails a transient community of people, and KIA is no different. I'm not exactly sure how many staff members are leaving after this year, but I do know that it will be a hard transition. Up until this point the idea of the end of the year and people leaving was just a far off thing. Something that would happen "eventually" and I didn't need to think about it. Well now I'm thinking about it and it's hard.

There is one family in particular who I anticipated returning next year. Because of various circumstances, they are not coming back. Today during our meeting I was overwhelmed with the realization of their departure. They are an incredible family with such stability and love for the Gospel. They have instilled great morals in their children and have made an impact on my heart. I will miss them incredibly next year and am overwhelmingly thankful that God chose to cross my path with theirs. I love the mysterious and perfect ways God ties everything together, building, shaping and growing me through so many different people and experiences.

Today I was reminded that these last few weeks of the school year should not be focused on anticipating the end and thinking only about what my next plans are. My focus should be on continuing to build the relationships that I have established here, continuing to pour into my students, continuing to grow in my relationship with Christ. Less me, more others.

25, 35, 42

Those are the numbers that I keep thinking about now.

25 days left of school.
35 days until I'm relaxing on the beach in Bali.
42 days until I'm back in Michigan.

I can't believe this year has gone by so quickly. It's amazing to think about all that has happened in the past almost 10 months. I came to Kunming wide-eyed and confused and now feel comfortable and happy in this city. I have made some incredible friends that made this year amazing. I have grown in my faith and knowledge of the Father through conversations, quiet times and experiences. I have confidence that this year (and next) is exactly where I need to be. There have been difficult moments, definitely. Much time has been spent thinking about my family and friends back home - wishing I could be there with them. But I'm here and I am glad I am able to take joy in that fact.

Pray with me that I would continue to take joy in being here even as I look forward to being home.

25. 35. 42.

"Before God's message can liberate other souls,
the liberation must be REAL in you."

-Oswald Chambers

Up and running - again

For almost the past 7 months I have been without access to my blog. I found ways to be able to see other people's blogs, but could not access my own. Strange thing about living in China...one of many strange things I guess.

But, for now, I'm back to blogging about my life and teaching in China. There is so much I could say about the past months, but I feel like I should skip over all that and just jump in to where I'm at in life now.

It's already March. I had the realization the other day that I have been living in China for 7 months. I haven't decided if that seems like a long time or not. It feels like it's flown by, and I'm amazed at how quickly I became adjusted to life here. The community I became a part of has been an enormous blessing to me. I know I would be in tears every night if I didn't have such wonderful, faithful people surrounding me day in and day out. Don't get me wrong, picking up my life and moving halfway around the world has not been an easy task. I often have to remind myself (or call other people to remind me...) that I am here for a purpose. It is not a chance thing and I am called to serve and glorify God wherever I am. How did I end up here? Why is my first year teaching experience in China? What will happen after next year? Why can't I have all the answers?

I had a great conversation with a friend from home recently that just reminded me to do whatever I can to make my faith real. It's true that I am here for a reason and God has a plan for me while I'm here, yada, yada, yada. I know all that in my head, but is it making a difference in my attitude, actions and faith? It is really making a difference in my life? Does it even matter that I'm here for a reason? Am I serving the purpose I am here for?

Deep thoughts and questions for my first post back in a while. I'm sure there aren't many, if any, people still reading this. But I'm hoping it will be a place for me to get some thoughts out, ask some tough questions and basically ramble for a while. Hope you enjoy :)